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Author Topic: Our past year's journey  (Read 5411 times)

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Offline meregirl

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Our past year's journey
« on: April 17, 2012, 05:36:48 am »
Well there have been quite a few changes and I apologize for the length.  Almost a year ago, I was so stressed and unhappy I felt like I was going to have a breakdown, when I realized that I needed to make some changes to all of the things that was contributing to my stress.

One minor one was this site.  I remember when Tim said this site goes through different personalities based upon the member base. It had gone in a direction that was so different from the place that I joined and spent so much of my time at.  Not being a internet persona person, who I was here was pretty much who I am in real life. This place was evolving and I wanted it to be like it was, where most people did not take such joy in attacking others and making others feel bad.  Not to say there weren't fights because there were but it was more above the belt kind of fights.  However things were different and I could not make the adjustment, I finally decided that it is not my place to try to change the direction of this site the only thing I could change is me. So I stopped logging on, every blue moon reading as a guest but not taking part.

Another major thing that happened was my job.  I was so miserable there, it was this awful soul stealing place that tried to rob me of who I was.  I have always been a pretty fearless person, but after being beat up and punished for being the person willing to have the difficult conversations, willing to stand up to the bullies at work and I begin to sit down and let things happen.  Managers that I knew were doing unethical things, where I tried to make them be accountable for it but getting no support from the leadership or corporate HR. When they said we have no tolerance for unethical behavior I believed them and fought to bring those things to light but really what they meant is that we don't want to hear about it.  So I had to learn how to do what everyone else was doing, turn the other cheek but it was killing me.  That is not what HR is supposed to do, they are supposed to fight the fights that need fighting.  I realized I had to get out of there but I had so much negativity in me that when I went on job interviews somehow of it's own volition that negativity would jump out and no one wants to hire a negative person.  Which created this vicious cycle and made me more unhappy and more negative.  I finally decided that this job was like a bad relationship.  If I did not take some time to heal and let go of the past, that I would bring that same terribleness into my new relationship (job).  So I decided to leave my job without having another one.  I took out all of my savings paid off car and credit cards and decided to try to find Meredith again.  I was lucky, I purchased my home with my mother 9 years ago and she said to me, I have never taking care of you your whole adult life, I can take care of the house while you get your sanity back.

So my husband and I left for the DR so he can attend a vocational program there.  We were there for 4 months and it was not an experience I would want to repeat.  Visiting DR and living there are 2 different things.  Let's just say I was glad to come back home.  So after we returned I begin looking for work, which in this economy is tough.  We found a job rediness program that once completed helps new immigrants with language difficulties to find a job.  Marino begin working temp at a cotton factory 12 hours a day 4 days a week, which on one hand was good but one the other bad.  It was bad because the cotton debris was activating his asthma terrible and us not having health insurance, was a constant stress to keep him healthy.

However to wrap this up because it is long enough, I finally found a job with a company that is paying a very nice relocation package and we are moving to Albuquerque, NM.  I start work April 30 and we have been running like crazy trying to clean and prepare our house for sale.  I am scared to move across the country, but also excited about the new opportunity.  Marino and I are doing very well, he has been such a bright spot in all of these changes supporting me through it all.  I am very lucky to have him in my life.
USCIS
07/31/09 - Married
08/11/09 - Overnighted I-130 to USCIS
08/17/09 - NOA1
09/29/09 - NOA2 (text & email received)

NVC
10/08/09 - SDO Case # Received
10/13/09 - E-mailed received from NVC, DS-3032 Generated.
10/13/09 - Sent Choice of Agent E-mail to NVC & Paid $70.00 AOS Fee
10/16/09 - AOS online receipt marked paid
10/19/09 - Overnighted I-864EZ
10/23/09 - AOS Documents entered into system
11/03/09 - DS3032 Choice Of Agent Received and Accepted
11/04/09 - IV Bill generated and Paid
11/05/09 - IV Receipt Marked Paid
11/09/09 - Overnighted DS230
11/17/09 - DS230 entered into NVC system
11/23/09 - RFE regarding police record asked for review
12/22/09 - Case Complete
01/28/10 - Found out about Cita
03/04/10 - Completed Medical Exam
03/30/10 - Cita!!!!!!!!!
APPROVED ;D
04/26/10 - POE @ EWR

Bring Your Dominican Family to the USA - Dominicans to the USA

Our past year's journey
« on: April 17, 2012, 05:36:48 am »

Offline gdwash717

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Re: Our past year's journey
« Reply #1 on: April 17, 2012, 06:54:41 am »
Well there have been quite a few changes and I apologize for the length.  Almost a year ago, I was so stressed and unhappy I felt like I was going to have a breakdown, when I realized that I needed to make some changes to all of the things that was contributing to my stress.

One minor one was this site.  I remember when Tim said this site goes through different personalities based upon the member base. It had gone in a direction that was so different from the place that I joined and spent so much of my time at.  Not being a internet persona person, who I was here was pretty much who I am in real life. This place was evolving and I wanted it to be like it was, where most people did not take such joy in attacking others and making others feel bad.  Not to say there weren't fights because there were but it was more above the belt kind of fights.  However things were different and I could not make the adjustment, I finally decided that it is not my place to try to change the direction of this site the only thing I could change is me. So I stopped logging on, every blue moon reading as a guest but not taking part.

Another major thing that happened was my job.  I was so miserable there, it was this awful soul stealing place that tried to rob me of who I was.  I have always been a pretty fearless person, but after being beat up and punished for being the person willing to have the difficult conversations, willing to stand up to the bullies at work and I begin to sit down and let things happen.  Managers that I knew were doing unethical things, where I tried to make them be accountable for it but getting no support from the leadership or corporate HR. When they said we have no tolerance for unethical behavior I believed them and fought to bring those things to light but really what they meant is that we don't want to hear about it.  So I had to learn how to do what everyone else was doing, turn the other cheek but it was killing me.  That is not what HR is supposed to do, they are supposed to fight the fights that need fighting.  I realized I had to get out of there but I had so much negativity in me that when I went on job interviews somehow of it's own volition that negativity would jump out and no one wants to hire a negative person.  Which created this vicious cycle and made me more unhappy and more negative.  I finally decided that this job was like a bad relationship.  If I did not take some time to heal and let go of the past, that I would bring that same terribleness into my new relationship (job).  So I decided to leave my job without having another one.  I took out all of my savings paid off car and credit cards and decided to try to find Meredith again.  I was lucky, I purchased my home with my mother 9 years ago and she said to me, I have never taking care of you your whole adult life, I can take care of the house while you get your sanity back.

So my husband and I left for the DR so he can attend a vocational program there.  We were there for 4 months and it was not an experience I would want to repeat.  Visiting DR and living there are 2 different things.  Let's just say I was glad to come back home.  So after we returned I begin looking for work, which in this economy is tough.  We found a job rediness program that once completed helps new immigrants with language difficulties to find a job.  Marino begin working temp at a cotton factory 12 hours a day 4 days a week, which on one hand was good but one the other bad.  It was bad because the cotton debris was activating his asthma terrible and us not having health insurance, was a constant stress to keep him healthy.

However to wrap this up because it is long enough, I finally found a job with a company that is paying a very nice relocation package and we are moving to Albuquerque, NM.  I start work April 30 and we have been running like crazy trying to clean and prepare our house for sale.  I am scared to move across the country, but also excited about the new opportunity.  Marino and I are doing very well, he has been such a bright spot in all of these changes supporting me through it all.  I am very lucky to have him in my life.


Bumps in the road of life Mere. Relocating, starting anew might be just what the doctor ordered. The climate should help hubby's asthma also. I hope things work out with the new job.

Offline marcfranc

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Re: Our past year's journey
« Reply #2 on: April 17, 2012, 06:55:59 am »
Wishing you all the best! Glad to hear from you.

Offline 3sheik

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Re: Our past year's journey
« Reply #3 on: April 17, 2012, 06:58:48 am »
thanks for the update mere. Many of the older members periodically have asked about you in the last year, so it's good to know you've come back a to a place in your life where you're comfortable.

I have a few friends who live in NM, and they love it. Plus, hubby will acclimate quickly because of the large Hispanic poulation.

Good luck with everything and come back to keep us posted on how things are going with you. Although the reasons you left the site are still here, you control what affects you, so choose to not be affected ;)
09/07/2007 <><><><> Married in POP, RD
09/25/2007 <><><><> Submitted I-130 (CR-1)
11/05/2008 <><><><> CR-1 Cita - Approved
11/15/2008 <><><><> POE - JFK

Lifting Conditions
=========================
09/23/2010 <><><><> Sent I-751
09/25/2010 <><><><> VT SC Rcvd
09/27/2010 <><><><> Check Cashed
09/29/2010 <><><><> NOA1 Rcvd
10/23/2010 <><><><> NOA2 Rcvd
11/16/2010 <><><><> Biometrics Appt
01/24/2011 <><><><> GC Received! [WEPA!]

Naturalization
=================================
12/01/2011 <><><><> Sent N-400
12/12/2011 <><><><> Check Cashed; Email Notification
12/14/2011 <><><><> NOA received (dated 12/07/2011)
12/29/2011 <><><><> Biometrics Appt
03/20/2012 <><><><> Naturalization Interview - Oath of Allegiance Taken - Certificate of Naturalization Acquired - Citizenship YA!!
06/11/2012 <><><><> Wife Received her US Passport

I-130 for Suegra
=================================
05/02/2012 <><><><> Sent I-130
05/07/2012 <><><><> Received NOA-1

Offline angelica

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Re: Our past year's journey
« Reply #4 on: April 17, 2012, 01:08:12 pm »
MERE!!!!! I have thought about you so many times. I am so happy to hear from you, and I am glad that you came back to let us know how you are doing. Sometimes the stresses of life catch up with us, and we need a "timeout", I applaud you for all the changes you have endured in trying to find that "comfortable place" within yourself. I wish you nothing but the very very best with this new move, and I also believe that Marino will acclimate easier there. Change can always be a positive thing, with the right attitude, desire and drive, you both will be just fine.
CR-1
10/03/08 - rec'd (VSC)
10/07/08 - NOA 1
10/13/08 - updated
10/27/08 - updated
10/28/08 - updated
05/12/09 - NOA2
05/14/09 - entered into system at NVC
05/28/09 - choice of agent emailed
05/28/09 - AOS fee paid online
06/01/09 - AOS mailed
06/02/09 - AOS received
06/05/09 - AOS entered in NVC system
06/11/09 - COA accepted
06/12/09 - IV bill rec'd
06/12/09 - IV bill paid
06/16/09 - DS230 mailed
06/17/09 - False RFE mailed for DS-230
06/17/09 - DS230 received
06/17/09 - AOS completed
07/01/09 - CASE COMPLETE :)
07/16/09 - Medical Exam Done

K-3
10/22/08 - rec'd (VSC)
10/28/08 - updated
05/12/09 - NOA2
05/18/09 - SDO# rec'd
05/18/09 - hard copy sent as well as electronically
05/19/09 - electronic copy received
05/27/09 - hard copy received and qualified for cita

08/03/09 - cita APPROVED !

08/07/09 - visa in hand (sti)

I-751
07/27/11 - rec'd (VSC)
07/29/11 - NOA
08/01/11 - cashed check
09/09/11 - Bio letter rec'd
10/03/11 - Biometrics appt.

Offline meregirl

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Re: Our past year's journey
« Reply #5 on: April 18, 2012, 05:33:04 pm »
Thank you GD, 3sheik, Marc and Ang!!! You guys are so sweet.  I hope Marino will acclimate better there for his health.
USCIS
07/31/09 - Married
08/11/09 - Overnighted I-130 to USCIS
08/17/09 - NOA1
09/29/09 - NOA2 (text & email received)

NVC
10/08/09 - SDO Case # Received
10/13/09 - E-mailed received from NVC, DS-3032 Generated.
10/13/09 - Sent Choice of Agent E-mail to NVC & Paid $70.00 AOS Fee
10/16/09 - AOS online receipt marked paid
10/19/09 - Overnighted I-864EZ
10/23/09 - AOS Documents entered into system
11/03/09 - DS3032 Choice Of Agent Received and Accepted
11/04/09 - IV Bill generated and Paid
11/05/09 - IV Receipt Marked Paid
11/09/09 - Overnighted DS230
11/17/09 - DS230 entered into NVC system
11/23/09 - RFE regarding police record asked for review
12/22/09 - Case Complete
01/28/10 - Found out about Cita
03/04/10 - Completed Medical Exam
03/30/10 - Cita!!!!!!!!!
APPROVED ;D
04/26/10 - POE @ EWR

Offline meregirl

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Re: Our past year's journey
« Reply #6 on: April 18, 2012, 05:39:35 pm »
Although the reasons you left the site are still here, you control what affects you, so choose to not be affected ;)

You are so right about that and I guess I feel there are so many situations in life where you don't have much of a choice and have to accept and adjust your emotional response, that the parts where you do have a choice why should you keep something or someone around in your life that has the potential to affect you.
USCIS
07/31/09 - Married
08/11/09 - Overnighted I-130 to USCIS
08/17/09 - NOA1
09/29/09 - NOA2 (text & email received)

NVC
10/08/09 - SDO Case # Received
10/13/09 - E-mailed received from NVC, DS-3032 Generated.
10/13/09 - Sent Choice of Agent E-mail to NVC & Paid $70.00 AOS Fee
10/16/09 - AOS online receipt marked paid
10/19/09 - Overnighted I-864EZ
10/23/09 - AOS Documents entered into system
11/03/09 - DS3032 Choice Of Agent Received and Accepted
11/04/09 - IV Bill generated and Paid
11/05/09 - IV Receipt Marked Paid
11/09/09 - Overnighted DS230
11/17/09 - DS230 entered into NVC system
11/23/09 - RFE regarding police record asked for review
12/22/09 - Case Complete
01/28/10 - Found out about Cita
03/04/10 - Completed Medical Exam
03/30/10 - Cita!!!!!!!!!
APPROVED ;D
04/26/10 - POE @ EWR

Offline mamacita

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Re: Our past year's journey
« Reply #7 on: April 18, 2012, 07:53:01 pm »
One minor one was this site.  I remember when Tim said this site goes through different personalities based upon the member base.

I have always enjoyed your positive persona on this forum...   :welcome: BACK :)
« Last Edit: April 18, 2012, 07:54:41 pm by mamacita »
Libras reveal just enough of themselves to let you know they're interested and conceal enough to keep you intrigued.


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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_WcWHZc8s2I

Offline josiee225

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Re: Our past year's journey
« Reply #8 on: April 24, 2012, 08:38:01 pm »
Great to hear from you.wishing u only but best of luck in our new chapter!

Offline josiee225

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Re: Our past year's journey
« Reply #9 on: April 27, 2012, 08:30:04 pm »
Quote from: josiee225  :domrep:link=topic=10145.msg221853#msg221853 date=1335325081
Great to hear from you.wishing u only but best of luck in ur new chapter!

Offline May

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Re: Our past year's journey
« Reply #10 on: April 28, 2012, 04:32:40 pm »
So happy to hear from you, I was wondering if ou ever made it out here after our conversation.  I guess its harder when you go to parts of tha country that are not the City of SDQ or STI. definite culture shock.  So happy you are doing good, you should have messaged maybe we could have met up.
What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger!!

Offline Flisa125

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Re: Our past year's journey
« Reply #11 on: April 28, 2012, 06:44:31 pm »
wow Mere it's true a lot happens in a year, I wish you nothing but the best. Enjoy your new beginning.
"Days are scrolls: write on them only what you want remembered!"
- Bchya Ibn Pakuda

Offline Raphael

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Re: Our past year's journey
« Reply #12 on: April 29, 2012, 08:57:31 am »
Mere, Gracias for responding to my email. I wish you nothing but the best!

A friend gives hope
When life is low
A friend's a place
Where you can go
A friend is honest
A friend is true
A friend is precious
My friend is you

...Brian Hope Gent

:domrep:

Offline bocachicaboo

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Re: Our past year's journey
« Reply #13 on: April 30, 2012, 11:33:29 am »
Mere,

I am so happy that things are moving in a positive direction for you and Marino.  Congratulations on your new job, and I wish you guys the best with the relocation.  I was so good to see you post again, I have missed you on the site for sure.

7/25/11 - Relocated to Miami
10/3/11 - Hubby has new job!!!
12/30/11 - First Trip Back to the DR
05/12/16 - Took a refresher trip to Punta Cana and we had a great time

Offline BebeLeger

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Re: Our past year's journey
« Reply #14 on: May 04, 2012, 01:04:42 pm »
I am so happy for you Mere, I was wondering how the rest of your trip went in DR. I am extremely excited for the changes to come ahead, I am sure that you will find this new opportunity to be rewarding and exciting. I am sure Marino will love the warmer weather. 
08/25/07 - 1st Trip (Met Hubby)
11/22-27/07 - 2nd Trip (Got together)
12/15-26/07 - 3rd Trip (First X-Mas)
02/08-17/08 - 4th Trip (First Valentines)
04/05-14/08 - 5th Trip (His B-Day & Wedding)
05/24-27/08 - 6th Trip (Honeymoon in Punta Cana)
06/18-22/08 - 7th Trip (My B-Day)
08/01-03/08 - 8th Trip (Surprise Baby)
08/06/08 - Sent I-130 (Hubby & Son)
08/11/08 - I-130 Received
08/16/08 - Received NOA I-797C
09/13-21/08 - 9th Trip (Surprise Baby)
11/18/08 - Received NOA I-797 (Application approved)
11/27-12/02/08 - 10th Trip (Thanksgiving Break)
12/02/08 - Received SDO #
12/03/08 - Paid AOS Fee $70.00
12/20/08 - Sent I-864
12/31/08 - I-864 Received
01/08/09 - Received Choice of Agent Form
01/23-02/01/09 - 11th Trip (Surprise Baby)
02/12-15/09 - 12th Trip (Second Valentines)
02/15/09 - Received Bill for IV
03/03/09 - Paid IV Fee $400.00 (2X)
03/31/09 - Sent DS-230 Part I & II
04/01/09 - DS-230 Part I & II Received
04/14/09 - Received Email Requesting Additional Documents (2X2 Pics)
04/14/09 - Hubby UPS Pics Overnight
04/16/09 - Sent 2X2 Pics
04/17/09 - Pics Received
04/21/09 - called NVC to find out if everything was ok, good!
05/14/09 - Case Complete
06/12 - 06/21/09 - 13th Trip (My B-Day)
07/24/09 - Medical Done!
08/06/09 - Cita - Approved then put on AR!
12/09/09 - AR cleared - FINALLY
12/27/09 - Going to DR w/Baby
Mid January Coming Back with HUBBY
01/14/10 - POE with Hubby, Baby & StepSon JFK
10/19/11 - Filed I-751
11/28/11 - Biometrics Appointment
Waiting.....

 

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